Remember the agony of childhood petty bullies? Remember Mom's advice on dealing with them? Ignore them. Don't stoop to their level. Be bigger than them! I'll bet you also thought, with all of your seven or eight years of wisdom, that Mom just didn't understand the trenches of childhood.
As older and wiser adults, we can see the wisdom in these words. Acting in small minded ways only makes us smaller with in the Universe and no one wins when acting in the smallest, basest way possible.
This ideal of "being big" is a popular and important part of most life-coaching, soul-entrepreneur-ing, and life-purpose delving programs. You hear it over and again, "You must play a bigger game, hold a bigger space in the Universe" if you're to find true success, fulfillment, abundance, or whatever word you use to describe what you desire. But what does it really mean? What does "being big" actually look like?
"Being big" means living your life from a place of authentic personal power. It's about fully and authentically expressing yourself in the world, and this happens when you hold a huge volume of vibration, an unwavering and awesome space, of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE!
"Ah hah!" says the higher self. "But wait!" shrieks the ego.
Being really big and truly holding forth in our place of power...these are things that frighten the stew out of us. They're places where ego hits hard with crazy stories about the nature of power; what power truly looks like within our individual worlds, what it will look like coming from someone else, how others will respond to our power, etc.
Why the crisis? Because the power we're most familiar with comes from ego. Ego power is about power over someone or being under the power/control of another person or situation. Authentic power which allows an overflowing of abundance has nothing to do with "power over" or "power under" and everything to do with love. Ego, always fearful of losing control, will work hard to sabotage you from stepping into your full brilliance by putting you into experiences of power over or power under.
It takes conscious effort to develop your awareness of your authentic power, and it begins with a willingness to recognize those moments in your life where you're already expressing authentic power. Ego works to make you dismiss and discount these moments, "Oh that's nothing. That's how I always do it. It doesn't count." Authentic power is effortless because there is no struggle to "win" or control another so our experience with it can easily slip by unnoticed. Becoming consciously aware of when and how you are in relationship from a place of authentic power will draw more and more such experiences to you. These new experiences are the return that happens when you allow yourself to show up in a big way and to be of service in the world in a big way.
How can you use your physical body to discover, integrate and be in relationship from a place of authentic power? How can you learn how to set appropriate boundaries in your relationships, own your authentic "no" and defend yourself when necessary from the unconsciousness of others? A great place to begin is in the martial arts, specifically the martial art from Japan called Aikido. The website: http://www.aikidoonline.com/ has powerful information about the founder of this "Martial Way" and the personal dilemma that led to its creation.